Dear
This is in a reply to your question about the problem of shaking hands in Netherlands.
It’s difficult to explain! Because it’s a secondary matter, and how can we understand details without understanding the basics ?
but after all I’ve found the way.
– First there are no intelligible words in the Holy Quran or in the True Hadith [words of the prophet] that say: ” it’s forbidden to shake hands!”
– The Prophet (Pbuh) himself has said ” I don’t shake hands with women” but does this mean that it is a confirmed rule for all the Muslims, or is it a special rule for the prophet himself for some reasons? especially that in many times the prophet himself had faced some female servants who came to him, caught his hand and asked him to come with them, and he accepted that without any kind of disapproval .
– We do have [Hadeths] talking about how bad it is to touch a women (without a religious permission), but does that mean just the touch or does it mean doing a forbidden touch as a sexual behavior.
Many of scholars say: “the touch means exactly sexual intercourse, and so all the introductions for that are not allowed”.
– There is no doubt that it’s forbidden to touch any women (except your wife) with a sexual intention.
– Many of Muslims [men and women] don’t shake hands as a behavior that helps to maintain the relationship between men and women safer and keeps the purity of their hearts (especially for young women).
Besides, it is not a mark of respect for men to shake hands with women and there is no connection between these two things.
[ All Muslims do believe that women are very respectable. And it’s not allowed for anyone to touch them whenever he wants!].
– Some Muslims consider shaking hands a big sin ( and they give it an extremely huge volume and a lot of intention ),but in many times they don’t judge the situations properly.
– Even if someone doesn’t shake hands to keep his/her heart purer ( in his/her opinion) or for any other reasons it doesn’t mean at all underestimating the others women/men.
– There is no problem at all in shaking hands with old women/men or with children.
– Many scholars say: “there is no matter in shaking hands, especially if it is done as a mark of respect or with trusty people”.
– There is a social criticism of many Muslims’ way of teaching that it’s not allowed at all and for any reason to shake hands with women/men (the opposit sex).
– Practically, many men who shake hands don’t start that unless ladies do first (as a kind of respect).
Summary and Judgment:
1- There is no clear and absolute proof that says: shaking hands is forbidden in Islam.
2- Shaking hands between men and women is not a current habit in Islamic societies , especially for Imams or from men towards women (as a mark of respect).
3- Every case in the Islamic law (in the basics of Fiqh) has a certain rule as one of the five postions which are [forbidden , unlikely , allowed , likely and obligatory] but according to ceratin situations this might change temporarily.
For instance, the main postion for drinking alcohol is forbiddening ,
but if you were out of water and felt that you would die unless you drink (close to die), drinking alcohol to survive in this certain situation would become allowed.
another example is that the main position for praying is obligation , but if we see any creature (man or even a horse …) fall into a well ; it’s forbidden to continue praying and you must stop and try to help , because saving life is more important now , and so for shaking hands.
4- In any case and in any society, shaking hands is directly related with your intention (Al Neyyah in Arabic) because the Prophet (Pbuh) said in a confirmed words: (Actions are but by intention); which means, with a good understanding of the five positions,that if you have a good intention there won’t be a problem, but if you have a bad intention it’s forbidden.
That what I told people in a general meeting in one of the mosques in Damascus 10 years ago , And Allah knows better.
Now for what the Imam have done : I think he believes that it’s forbidden to shake hands with women (I understand him but I don’t agree with him), and if he does this he will face a social criticism from many Muslims .They will consider him as an Imam who doesn’t respect Islam as he must do. (it’s now a social problem more than a religious ).
Opinions of some religion students:
– There was an exam for high class students in a religious institute in Damascus and I’ve asked them to give me written answers to the shaking hands problem in Netherlands, and the results were as follow (the sample consists of 16 students) :
– ( 2 studnets) said: “It’s forbidden, but the Imam must explain the reasons “.
– ( 14 students) said : the Imam must shake hands and they mentioned the following reasons:
1- It gives a good picture of Islam (4 students).
2- Islam is a love for everybody (1 student).
3- We must respect guests (1 student).
4- To have a good connection with society (1 student).
5- To avoid making problems with society (2 students).
6- The religious benefit needs that (2 student).
7- Islam is open-minded (1 student).
8- It is wise to do that (1 student).
9- Some scholars say it is allowed (1 student).
And Allah s.w knows better.
Finally, I hope that I’ve explained this matter enough ,and that things are clearer now .
If you have any comments please don’t hesistate to contact me.
I am looking forward to hearing from you soon
best wishes,
M.Alkhatib
